Thursday, August 27, 2009

Random Conversation

Yesterday I had the privilege of being able to ask my childhood best friend and his roommates how they each felt about MY hair. I've been missing because I have been working on my YouTube channel. Of the three, two concluded that they did NOT like my hair at all.

This is part of my response.Can I be upset at them for stating their opinions? No, but I will say that words hurt. I'm glad that we all were able to have this conversation. Can we blame society? Partially. The reason that I say this is because if you are an adult and live in the US, we have freedoms. The first being able to express ourselves freely without being JUDGED. SLAVERY mindset still exists even today. Read "Hair Story: Untangling the Roots of Black Hair in America" if you haven't already.

I agree that it is hard to appreciate something that you are not accustomed to. Christopher stated that "I need to see more women with natural hair". True, if more women would wear their hair natural, I do believe that black men would appreciate our hair. LACK of EDUCATION is to blame as well. When you grow up and you are taught at an early age that your hair is "bad", it is no wonder that there is hesitancy when you do decide to go natural. I’m not being disrespectful to our ancestors BUT what has been taught has been passed down for generations and that is all that we KNOW. WE have the ability to accept changes within our own lives. EDUCATION and KNOWLEDGE is the leader of progression. Hard to do that without either.

I’m not trying to make excuses or place blame on anyone or anything. There are many factors and this will be a debate that will probably continue on this Earth even after I’m long gone.

I want change. It begins with me. When I have children, I want to pass my values and beliefs to them. My girls are going to be natural until they are old enough to make a decision about their hair. But as children, I will nurture and care for their hair. As they age, they will realize that others may be different but I believe that change begins with ME.

I’m not going to say that these guys didn’t learn from this conversation and you do have to keep in mind that this was amongst 4 people. This is just ONE perspective of many and I had the opportunity to be able to record and publish this. They understand about HEALTH risks, COSTS, and INCONVENIENCE of relaxers. But they have a new insight on women and what WE as African Americans go through to keep our hair up.

I’m hoping that Chris Rocks movie “Good Hair” is educational and informative. All three earned themselves a ticket to see this movie. I’ve recommended a few books to them as well. But everyone has their preferences and opinions. I RESPECT that.

I love my hair. Any male that I am involved with IS and WILL appreciate my hair and ME for who I am. Nothing like a man that loves, adores, and cherishes his QUEEN.


Chanel said...

hahaha at your second friend, he was afraid to say "no, he did'nt like it"
Seems like long hair will always be a sign of beauty to men. I wish I could have seen how you had your hair that day.